I find men are particularly vulnerable to the lie they don't matter to their children. It's why many fathers can walk away from their kids, but so few mothers do. Stepfathers with their own biological children have an added pressure: guilt. If you spend more time with your stepchildren than your own children, guilt and the lie you don't matter makes some dads disconnect. Some guys go in the opposite direction and remain distant from their stepchildren. Hey dad, you're important to everybody.